should be paid within a week after the event which occasions them. If
the acquaintance, however, is but slight, then immediately after the
family has appeared at public worship. A lady should send in her card,
and if her friends be able to receive her, the visitor's manner and
conversation should be subdued and in harmony with the character of her
visit. Courtesy would dictate that a mourning card should be used, and
that visitors, in paying condoling visits, should be dressed in black,
either silk or plain-coloured apparel. Sympathy with the affliction of
the family, is thus expressed, and these attentions are, in such cases,
pleasing and soothing.
In all these visits, if your acquaintance or friend be not at
home, a card should be left. If in a carriage, the servant will
answer your inquiry and receive your card; if paying your visits
on foot, give your card to the servant in the hall, but leave to
go in and rest should on no account be asked. The form of words,
"Not at home," may be understood in different senses; but the
only courteous way is to receive them as being perfectly true.
You may imagine that the lady of the house is really at home,
and that she would make an exception in your favour, or you may
think that your acquaintance is not desired; but, in either
case, not the slightest word is to escape you, which would
suggest, on your part, such an impression.