petty annoyances, and other every-day incidents, should never be
mentioned to your friends. The extreme injudiciousness of repeating
these will be at once apparent, when we reflect on the unsatisfactory
discussions which they too frequently occasion, and on the load of
advice which they are the cause of being tendered, and which is, too
often, of a kind neither to be useful nor agreeable. Greater events,
whether of joy or sorrow, should be communicated to friends; and, on
such occasions, their sympathy gratifies and comforts. If the mistress
be a wife, never let an account of her husband's failings pass her lips;
and in cultivating the power of conversation, she should keep the
versified advice of Cowper continually in her memory, that it
"Should flow like water after summer showers,
Not as if raised by mere mechanic powers."
In reference to its style, Dr. Johnson, who was himself greatly
distinguished for his colloquial abilities, says that "no style is more
extensively acceptable than the narrative, because this does not carry
an air of superiority over the rest of the company; and, therefore, is
most likely to please them. For this purpose we should store our memory
with short anecdotes and entertaining pieces of history. Almost every
one listens with eagerness to extemporary history. Vanity often
co-operates with curiosity; for he that is a hearer in one place wishes
to qualify himself to be a principal speaker in some inferior company;
and therefore more attention is given to narrations than anything else
in conversation. It is true, indeed, that sallies of wit and quick
replies are very pleasing in conversation; but they frequently tend to
raise envy in some of the company: but the narrative way neither raises
this, nor any other evil passion, but keeps all the company nearly upon
an equality, and, if judiciously managed, will at once entertain and
improve them all."